Most memorable moments this week: a List

- Waiting impatiently for my new prescription medication, promising to bring such relief, which came nearly 4 days later than anticipated because, ya know, global pandemic.

- Receiving my new prescription medication, via brave delivery man, for free thanks to my insurance. I cried.

- Repotting all our house plants and feeling the joy of new oxygen and life inside the walls of the beloved Winter Palace

- Tati intuitively knowing my sorrow, and electing to nuzzle with me as “baby spoon” on the sofa when she could tell I felt extra miserable 


- Sharing our second-ever Shabbat at home; so chilling when the whole world is in a permanent "Sabbath" - making Sabbath special in the face of this reality.

- Meditating. Daily. At dawn. (Who do I think I am, a person in a lifestyle magazine? What will I do next— alkaline my body? Swear my inner glow is from drinking water and nothing else?)

- Writing at least 5 postcards every day

- Watching the magnolia trees bloom

- Holding my love while he wept

- The feeling of the sun on my skin

- The twists and turns of Westworld

- The twists and turns of THIS ACTAULFREAKINGWORLD

- Feeling the collective “spine crack” of the world on Sunday night, as the reality of this pandemic, its death toll, its economic toll, its length and breadth, and utter devastation truly sets in across the city and the country and the globe…

- The news announcing that 100-200K deaths as the projected "good news..." 

- Watching Governor Cuomo kick unbelievable freakin' ass. 

- The state and city officially under executive lockdown

- The slow, meditative pleasure in making a perfect cup of coffee

- The micro-bucolic pleasure of buying, potting and caring for indoor plants. Bringing the outside in. Caring for living things. Seeing them thrive.
 
- The quietest Saturday night I’ve ever seen (and I’ve spent a Saturday night in SIBERIA)

- Hanging a bird feeder 
outside our window (so Tati can watch the birds) and then? Watching her watch the damn birds.

- The extraordinary irony of it being ...April Fool’s Day. 

"joy is there: everywhere"