They brought a woman from the street And made her sit in the stalls By threats By bribes By flattery Obliging her to share a little of her life with actors
But I don't understand art
Sit still, they said
But I don't want to see sad things
Sit still, they said
And she listened to everything Understanding some things But not others Laughing rarely, and always without knowing why Sometimes suffering disgust Sometimes thoroughly amazed And in the light again, said
If that's art I think it is hard work It was beyond me So much beyond my actual life
But something troubled her Something gnawed her peace And she came a second time, armoured with friends
Sit still, she said
And again, she listened to everything This time understanding different things This time untroubled that some things Could not be understood Laughing rarely but now without shame Sometimes suffering disgust Sometimes thoroughly amazed And in the light again said
This is art, it is hard work And one friend said, too hard for me And the other said, if you will I will come again Because I found it hard I felt honoured
- The slow closing up of the world… - The Quiet. The beautiful, terrifying Quiet. - Pink blossoms in full bloom on the corner of 33rd and Broadway, with beautiful Edison bulbs hanging inside them. It took my breath away!
- a two-hour conversation on the phone with Tyne. My beloved friend and mentor. - An extraordinary email from Ruthy Froch, that left me reeling
- Sending and receiving postcards and letters.
- Watching Trump destroy our country and himself, being filled with anger but mostly extraordinary sadness; and a fire in my belly to do everything in my power to contribute to changing the future.
- The passing of my friend, colleague, and inspiration, Terence McNally.
- And how many wonderful texts, emails, phone calls, and conversations with those who shared his days his passing inspired, and how grateful I feel to have been lucky enough to have been in his circle. - Lessons from Tati (Eat that snack. Take the nap. Don’t morally assess anything. Don’t do. Be.)
- The incredibly somber moment Alec and I stopped in our tracks as we came across the impromptu refrigerated morgues outside on the sidewalk of Mt Sinai Queens.
- Everything I learned whilst teaching - Learning that thinking outside the box about how to stay connected whilst apart has provided all of us with huge new ideas and experiences never previously explored. Digital classes, weddings, funerals, birthdays… a way to be included where we’d previously assume one could not be included. - Cooking with Alec - Watching “Sister Act” with Alec and bursting at the seams with joy [and full choreography performed at 100] sharing it with him - Dawn FaceTimes with Bobby every Tuesday. - The birds that are starting to figure out that our bird feeder is a new local hangout in the neighborhood (and of course, Tati’s response…)
- This new concept of time...
- The freeing, masked, frightened and dangerous walks we took, almost every day - Supporting Etai. And Alexandra. Proverbially holding them. - Alec, making a sweet little breakfast (grain-free) toast and egg every morning, and brought it to me on a blue plate and with the proudest grin.
- Confronting The Quiet.
- ...and welcoming it, too.
- The discovery that "returning to normal" is not possible, and not going to happen, and the accompanying grief in response to that reality...
- ... and Yet. Yet. The recognition that our world's "normal" was not sustainable; our planet could not survive it, our bodies could not endure the stress, the hustle, the culture of lack. That we have been forced to face the consequences of our actions and thus, must build a new world. We have thus been invited--inside this horrendous global catastrophe filled with plague and fear and death-- to imagine a world with less hustle, less poverty, less inequity, and filled with more compassion, fairness, empathy, and wellness for ourselves and our one and only planet. - Dawns. Lots of Dawns.
As we wake in another, searching for sense and stability, practicing
the practice of life within chaos theory, I asked Jane to read for us
one of the most beautiful and perspectival poems from this miraculous
book — a poem of consolation by way of calibration; an invitation to
broaden our perspective — scientific, temporal, and humanistic — and
weigh the immediate against the eternal."
*
TODAY, ANOTHER UNIVERSEby Jane Hirshfield
The arborist has determined:
senescence beetles canker
quickened by drought
but in any case
not prunable not treatable not to be propped. And so. The branch from which the sharp-shinned hawks and their mate-cries. The trunk where the ant. The red squirrels’ eighty-foot playground. The bark cambium pine-sap cluster of needles. The Japanese patterns the ink-net. The dapple on certain fish. Today, for some, a universe will vanish.
First noisily,
then just another silence. The silence of after, once the theater has emptied. Of bewilderment after the glacier,
the species, the star. Something else, in the scale of quickening things,
will replace it, this hole of light in the light, the puzzled birds swerving around it.
- Sleeping in - The Pad Thai, the Pad Thai, and ALL the leftover Pad Thai (we have only ordered delivery once since Quarantine began— and on April 17, the one-month mark of my return from London, we celebrated by ordering pad thai for oh: perhaps a family of 10?)
- Zoom (who knew?)
- "The Daily" podcast from The New York Times. - Gratitude
- Deep breaths
- This blog
- Seeing new growth on the new Chinese Money Tree I was sure I sun-scorched to death. (A metaphor?)
- Not passing a single scrap of judgment on my sleep schedule, outfit choices, or lack thereof.
- Alec and Tati
Alec (+Tati) in our newly painted room!
- Mom
- Marco Polo (I like to see faces and hear voices and be in contact, but sometimes doing it LIVE [say, on FaceTime] is stressful. Thanks Marco Polo. You’re an Introvert’s DREAM)
- Teaching! (Oh, the teaching.)
- Making over the apartment! (The Winter Palace is getting a GLOW UP. Hey gurl...)
- Hope
- Laughter
- Allowing huge, heaving sobs to just flow and leave me, and feeling lighter
- Leanring a little more Hebrew, day by day!
- The new coffee maker and the (kick-ass) coffee it makes
- Unexpected mail (in the actual post) from my friends, all bursting with paper embraces and the closest thing to physical contact with others
Amy's 40th Birthday Bash!
- One of my dearest friends, Amy Maiden's 40th birthday bash held on Zoom in AUSTRALIA.
- Almond butter. I love you, Almond Butter. - Therapy on the phone (even when, if not ESPECIALLY when, I was convinced I “didn’t need therapy this week” and then monologued about feelings for 90 minutes…)
- The discovery that my health insurance is waving it’s premium for the next quarter (the privilege, the privilege, the extraordinary privilege to even HAVE Health Insurance in this pathetic, broken country)
- A glorious, unexpected email from actress Ruthy Froch (Hodel in the National Tour of the Fiddler production I did on Broadway)
- The clapping and cheering for health care workers every evening at 7pm
- The homemade signs up in windows all
over Astoria thanking Essential Workers, cheering on the downtrodden,
and generally reminding us that we truly are in this together. - Smiles from eyes, above face masks… (and the friendly "hellos" people are getting a bit braver to offer from below their masks...)
For those of you who have been reading along for all these years now, it comes as no surprise to remind you that fine visual artist, author, unofficial apprentice to “The Trickster,” and now my dear friend and colleague, Nick Bantock, has likely been the greatest artistic and creative influence in my life.
In his book “The Trickster’s Hat” dedicated to an “apprenticeship in creativity,” Nick Bantock writes:
“If you want a shortcut to originality…this isn’t the book for you. On the other hand, if you’re willing o be led hither and thither down unlikely paths by fellow of dubious reputation, if you’re prepared to keep a sense of humor and not be fazed when he plucks the unexpected out of a mischief-studded hat, if you’re ready to zigzag, detour, and wander in search of a better understanding of your artistic core, then please feel free to slip-slide further into these pages.”
And slip, you absolutely should.
What I have come (both in reading and experiencing first-hand) to understand about Bantock’s remarkable take on the creative force, is that he does so in the spirit of a slightly naughty child— the place where all best play gets done if you think about it. The question “what can I get away with” is as crucial to breaking the shackles of creative bondage as any skill. Giving oneself permission to break the rules and be led by, if not become, the “Trickster” as he calls it, is over half the battle.
*
1. Exercise #3: Add Up a Series of One-digit Numbers…FAST!
Adding up small numbers in your head quickly (4+7+9+3+2+2+8+5+8…) compels you to continually change the information that you are having to work with and remember. As you’re adding up the numbers, your grand total constantly changes and to arrive at the next total you have to focus solely on your current total and the next number you are adding.
There are very few mental exercises where focus and continually evolving information play such an important part. Which is why this one is so helpful in training the mind to remember essential information while deleting other data or details when they are no longer needed.
So the next time you’re standing in line at the grocery store and you’re tempted to whip out your cell phone and send a text, why don’t you instead whip out a dollar bill and add up the serial numbers as fast as possible!
“One of the favored tricks of blocked creatives is saying no to ourselves. It is astonishing the number of small ways we discover to be mean and miserly with ourselves. When I say this to my students, they often protest that this is not true—that they are very good to themselves. Then I ask them to do this exercise.
List ten things you love and would love to do but are not allowed to do. Your list might look like this:
1. Go dancing.
2. Carry a sketchbook.
3. Roller-skate.
4. Buy new cowboy boots.
5. Streak your hair blond.
6. Go on vacation.
7. Take flying lessons.
8. Move to a bigger place.
9. Direct a play.
10. Take a life-drawing class.
Very often, the mere act of writing out your list of forbidden joys breaks down your barriers to doing them. Post your list somewhere highly visible.”
3. Turn Your World Upside-Down
One infallible way to really shake
things up in your clogged-up creative mind is to literally turn your
world (or drawing) upside-down.
Directions:
- Locate a picture of a person’s face (it can be a conventional photograph or something more abstract)
-
Now turn the image upside-down, and re-create the images that way. Try to ignore the fact that you are drawing a “human face—” that concept comes with many preconceived notions about what human faces are "supposed to" look like, and it puts our brain on automatic pilot, robbing you of valuable observation skills! Instead concentrate on the basics: shapes,
lines, angles, and patches of light and dark. You’ll be surprised at what your eyes are missing in the every day when you view the world with less scrutiny!
Based on concepts from Betty Edward’s book
Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain, this exercise is used to strip us of our conditioned perspective to look for recognizable features that make up the face. Instead of seeing, “oh this is where the nose is supposed to go, this is the place for the eyes,” we begin to see the face for how it actually is.
Now, this can be applied to anything: writing, photography, lyrics to a song, reading a play out of order. Take the concept and run with it.
4. Finishing Lines.
An exercise from Bantock’s own book.
“The standard way of writing fiction is to plot a story line, then flesh it out as you go along. Once begun, some authors like Joseph Conrad would work on one page at a time for eight hours a day. Others, like George Simenon, the creator of the French detective Maigret, would spend weeks mentally developing a storyline, then explode onto paper with 200 pages in 48 hours. Their speed may have been vastly different, but their linear approach was similar. However, that is not the only way to write. […] The next exercise is meant to be a springboard. I’ll start you and then you take it from there"
Materials: pen and notebook Time: 30 mins Instructions:
- Add to the following starting points by writing down whatever comes to mind.
- Don’t stop to think— just go with your stream of consciousness.
- Complete this sentence:
the horse felt obliged to express itself by…
- When you’ve done that, write down the sentence that might come BEFORE that sentence.
- Now add another sentence to finish:
She could not help herself, the date was waiting… … The horse felt obliged to express itself by…
- Same again.
- Write the preceding sentence and the following one.
- And again complete and add the before and after:
…Elvira looked at her brother’s fast-growing…
- You should now have three sets of sentences.
- See if you can find a way to link these sets together in a vaguely cohesive fashion.
- Once you’ve done that, you can go back in and edit it, changing a few words here and there to help bring it together. By then it should have some life of its own. Try expanding it further, developing any characters or themes that have begun to show themselves.
- Just write— keep going until your 30 minutes are up. Then read it aloud to yourself.”
- Trying to [falsely] control anything. [Because literally LITERALLY, we cannot control a single actual thing other than our own responses to life right now. And let’s face it: sometimes not even that.]
- Caring what others think. [I’m not gonna wear pants and you know what? I don’t care. I don’t care if YOU care. And I suspect you’re probably not wearing pants either so don’t come for me, Karen]
- Judgment (of self and of others). [*GIANT SIIIIIIGH*] A big one. What do I care what people are posting on the internet? What business is it of mine if someone feels good and productive and contributory singing sad songs at their piano on Instagram Live, or making videos about frothy coffee? Who cares if others are doing a Zoom play reading, or organizing a gigantic Google Hang reunion, or interviewing their friends on YouTube for charity or even just for fun? If it isn’t your vibe, that’s okay. Decline to tune in. If it makes them feel better right now, good for them. Let them do their thing. I (and you) have the agency to decline to participate. You don’t have to tune in! You don’t even have to know it’s happening! USE that wonderful mute button and revisit that follow when the Pandemic is over. And if you press mute and feel guilty about it, let me say this: right now, almost everything we consume that has to do with human connection occurs on the internet. It is currently your only lifeline and your entire life. Thus, it is crucial that it is curated and nourishing. Plus, it is YOUR internet space; no one else’s. You get to determine what invades your psyche at all times, but particularly when times are tough. What you consume, you create more of in your life. And if what you are consuming is stressing you out? Look away. No harm done. Look away and let those people do their thing. Grace. Compassion. Empathy. For yourself. For others. We’re all doing the best we can inside an unprecedented and horrendous global situation.
- Grouchiness [Ohhhhhhh maaaaaaan can AlSilbs get “the grumps” like an old man screaming “get off my lawn!” Luckily I’m almost always self-aware about it and can laugh simultaneously. But it’s still fairly unpleasant.]
- Sleeping absolutely bizarre hours [What’s up 4am—wanna ALPHABATIZE THESE SPICES?!]
- Cabin fever
- Leaving the dishes in the sink overnight [because ya know, despair]
- Turning into Gollum or Wolfman
- Cutting my own hair [Okayokay— this one I’m failing at. I trimmed my own hair with kitchen scissors at 6:30am last week and yes I know how insane that sounds]
- Aggressive optimism
- Buying too many plants.
- “Compare and Despair” on social media. “Are they doing Pandemic better/cooler/more productively/altruistically than *I* am?!” is the new “Are they doing adulthood better than I am?” I just made up a word. Just this second. It’s called “PENVY” It’s a portmanteau of Panic+Envy. Suddenly, what was once vague PENVY about whether or not you will ever be able to casually afford that barre class being touted by the perfect-married-mom-of-two-but-still-has-a-perfect-body-and-also-looks-quite-rich lady, you’re worried that you’re not ENDURING GLOBAL CATASTROPHE in the “correct” manner. God, it’s exhausting. And I’m trying not to participate in that drama, online or in my squirrel brain.
- Playing any board games with Alec and his friends that involve me pretending to be like, a TROLL or something
- Over-feeding Tati [in a lame attempt to excuse possibly over-feeding myself?? Anyone? Any armchair psychologists wanna chime in here?]
- “Zoom cocktail parties” [Because frankly, they simply are not cocktail parties. I’m still half-dressed from the waist up holding a homemade “Quarantini”]
- Negative self-talk Another big one. Let’s be gentle and be kind to our poor selves going through a huge global trauma, shared and individual. Be soft with ourselves. Give ourselves grace. It’s okay to not achieve. It’s okay to not be productive. It’s okay to get a little “soft” in the body because everything is Alice in Wonderland right now. It’s okay to nap 3 times. This is hard. Take off those pants, gurl. Or put those pants on! Naked face or a full beat. Whatever. Do what makes you feel good. What are we trying to prove, and to whom?
- Losing hope <3
Stay strong, dearest readers. We can do this. OH: and don't cut your own hair. Please.
- The quality of gorgeous, soft, arching light as it moves across the apartment over the course of a day...
- The unstoppable on-coming of Spring. [Spring is not cancelled. Nor is Love.]
- The hugeness of heart, and inextinguishable spirit of New York Freakin' City
- Governor Cuomo: kicking extreme, superhero-level, ass. [#PRESIDENTCUOMO]
- Waking before dawn every day. Greeting the day with ritual and respect [lighting a candle, morning pages, meditation, gratitudes], and feeling a sense of total possibility as the light fills the sky
- A new *concept of time* as it passes in these long stretches
- Alec’s loving eyes
- Alec's valiance and courage
- Tati simply *being*
- Empty streets
- The absolute, absolute, bone-chilling Quiet
- Masked people walking in confusion and fear
- Quiet Saturday nights in New York.
- Quiet every. Single. Nights. in New York.
- The news. The goddam news.
- The naive and beautiful confusion of all the animals
- The lack of “hustle”
- Cooking and eating slowly
- Wondering what else there might be to fix around the house
- Journaling without any goals
- The absolutely delicious, indulgent pleasure of sending (and receiving!) written correspondence
- The people I made time for, connected with, and got to know better, because of the pandemic.
- The genuine camaraderie of a shared global adversity. Feeling a part of something so definitive, world-changing, and so much bigger than myself, however horrific.
- Being THIS vividly in touch with my mind, body, and soul
- Learning about humanity inside the crisis. Learning about my own humanity and the nature of humanity.
- Asking huge questions about what this all means. For us as individuals, as a country, as a planet, as a species…
Dr. Brené Brown, researcher, speaker, seeker and author extraordinaire, has the following to say about creativity:
“Here's what I've learned about creativity from the world of wholehearted living and loving:
1. “I’m not very creative” doesn’t work. There’s no such thing as creative people and non-creative people. There are only people who use their creativity and people who don’t. Unused creativity isn't benign. It lives within us until it’s expressed, neglected to death, or suffocated by resentment and fear.
2. The only unique contribution that we will ever make in this world will be born of our creativity.
3. If we want to make meaning, we need to make art. Cook, write, draw, doodle, paint, scrapbook, take pictures, collage, knit, rebuild an engine, sculpt, dance, decorate, act, sing – it doesn’t matter. As long as we’re creating, we’re cultivating meaning.”
1. Use The “Dr. Seuss Technique”
While a creative block usually comes because we simply can’t come up with any new ideas, it can also come from having too many.
The blank page is scary, not only because of what’s not there but because of all the potential it holds.
So, if you’re feeling overwhelmed with the work, follow the Dr. Seuss technique.
Before writing Green Eggs and Ham, his beloved children’s book that has sold 200 million copies around the world, Theo Geisel (Dr. Seuss’s real name), had accepted a bet from his publisher, Bennett Cerf. There was only $50 on the line, but Cerf said Geisel couldn’t write an entertaining children’s book using only 50 different words.
We all know what happened. But why?
There are a few reasons the constraint actually made Seuss more creative:
• It forced him to use novel solutions. If you’re a photographer and don’t have a lighting setup, you think up new ways to get the shot you want.
• He wasn’t distracted by options. When your options are limited, you don’t fall victim to choice paralysis and can focus on getting things done.
• It made him think practically. When your canvas or toolkit changes, you have to rethink what you can actually do. This changes the conversation from “What should I do?” to “What can I do with what I have?”
2. Try "Translating"
Ideas are greatly stimulated by the process of transformation. Converting things from one form or medium into another can guide thoughts in totally new and exciting directions. One idea leads to another—and then you’re off on the ideas trail.
The Russian artist Wassily Kandinsky translated classical music into abstract paintings, selecting different colors to signify the varying emotions the music provoked. He also invented a machine that translated musical sounds into instructions for paintings.
Project:
- "Translate" the following words into an image or into a physical manifestation of typography—
LAZY
HAPPY
LOUD
SOFT.
"You're horrible at 4,5,6,7 things! SEVEN-- AH HA HA!"
3. Your Self-Critic Won’t Leave You Alone? Set Tiny Goals With Strict Deadlines
There’s a nagging voice we hear when we hit a creative block.
Enemy Thy Name is SELF CRITIC.
Enemy Thy Name is CENSOR.
Enemy Thy Name is... VAMPIRE.
You know the Voice. It might be the voice of your doesn't-get-it-Grandma or your middle school art teacher (me! My 8th grade Art teacher was a major worst-kind-of-teacher jerk), or your always prettier and better than you sister. It might be the voice of The Count from Sesame Street. Look I dunno your life. What I do know is that the messages are always the same:
This isn’t good enough. You’re terrible. No one’s going to like this. Why are you even doing this? No matter what you ever do, you will never be good enough.
The jerk-face, bold-faced-lying Self-Critic is a foe we have all faced. (Some genius people even wrote a whole song in a musical about it and may I humbly suggest "Die, Vampire, Die" become your personal ANTHEM) But look I get it: at times the Vampire Voice can get so loud that it drowns out our ability to do anything at all. You get stuck, and you need a few cloves of garlic to free your sorry self.
Here's a basic tool you can use to shut it up (or at least quiet it enough to get back to work).
After finishing his first novel in 1847, author Anthony Trollope would go on to publish 47 novels, 18 pieces of nonfiction, 12 short stories, and two plays in his lifetime. Good for you, Trollope. How did you do it?
Trollope’s secret to never being blocked? Simple: Stick to a strict schedule.
Specifically, he would write 250 words every 15 minutes, using his watch to keep him honest.
Not only did Trollope’s schedule silence his self-doubt (the Vampire couldn't get a Transylvanian word in edgewise! No time!), but it actually built creative momentum. The faster you complete a creative task, the more you put yourself in a mindset of productivity, and nothing has ever been accomplished without productivity. Ideas don't get published. Ideas don't get produced or hung on walls. Physical, real things do.
Exercise:
- Collect a pen and paper, or your favorite typing device.
- Turn off distractions (especially temporarily disconnect the internet)
- Set a timer for 15 minutes
- Write about a cause you believe in, passionately. The more it fires you up the better.
- Do not stop for any reason--spelling, grammar, better ideas, the cat being adorable/annoying.
You'll be astonished at what happens when you hyper-focus your attention on a simple task for a set period of time. Facebook and the cat will be there on the other end of the exercise. I promise.
It was such an honor (not to mention such a source of healing) to speak with One Detroit's own Christy McDonald, sending my unconditional love and support yo my hometown of Detroit Michigan.
"Do art and music help you connect with your emotions?
Author and Broadway performer Alexandra Silber talks with One Detroit's Christy McDonald about what it's like to live in "the city that never sleeps" during the COVID-19 pandemic, as well as how the arts affect performers and observers, and the healing power of music.
NEWS FLASH:
#OneDetroit is now on Detroit Public Television TWICE weekly - with two new shows every week! Tune in this Monday, April 13 at 7:30p ET for the debut of our new Monday show, featuring a special performance by Alexandra Silber."
Something unfamiliar and somewhat wondrous begins to happen when one spends long stretches of time in solitude. That is what this period of time is for many of us, despite our human species’ creativity about how to connect remotely.
Still, we all long for relationships in these harrowing times. And sometimes the people we long to spend these fallow days with are far away or not far at all but kept from us.
My suggestion? Why not make some new “friends” in the company of books? Sure. If you want to pretend you’re hanging out with brand new friends when you’re actually alllllll byyyyyyy yoursssssself why not read a memoir?
Speaking of all by yourself, is this what you currently look like in quarantine?
I’ve made an honest attempt to collect a series of stories from voices that the wider (white, cis, straight) world are not used to hearing from prior to the great expansion of POC and LGBTQ+ storytellers. I am thrilled that the world is being given the grace and platform they long deserved to share their stories globally and with devotion.
Besides, there is nothing more expansive than meeting a new culture, point of view, or a generally “different from me” experience of this life! When that experience is solidified by the empathic connection of “making a new friend” you might not otherwise meet in real life, (especially now because, ya see: social distancing) the experience can be shamanistic in its magic.
Enjoy your new friends.
*
Repeated PSA
In all times, but particularly in these times of extraordinary economic struggle for all, I strongly advise you philanthropic and socially-minded readers to support your local communities by purchasing your books locally from local bookstores—many of whom are happy to or ship books to your door, or drop them off personally, at least six feet away from your face.
Buying at local stores keeps money in the local community, supports independent enterprises and also reduces your carbon footprint!
There are a number of sites that make it easier to find and support local independent bookstores in your area.
Chief among them:
• IndieBound.org: Find bookstores and other independent retailers near you. (Says Indiebound: “Spend $100 at a local and $68 of that stays in your community. Spend the same $100 at a national chain, and your community only sees $43.”)
Other book resources:
• WorldCat: Search for a book title at your local library!
(Right now, it is very helpful to make financial donations to local libraries for those who cannot afford to purchase new or used books, and I strongly encourage you to sign up for the library’s downloadable books programs to avoid unnecessary public outings.)
• Bookshare provides accessible books and periodicals for readers with print disabilities. Everyone, of every ability, deserves the gift of reading!
*
1. Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic, by Alison Bechdel
I wouldn’t be a good little musical theatre girl without sharing the Alison Bechdel’s darkly comic autobiography Fun Home.
This 2006 piece of work is so far beyond the realm of a “comic,” so deftly wrought in its humor and candor and coming-out-of-the-closet-whilst-coming-of-age-ness, all told with the help of the author’s gothic artwork. The subject material, married with its visual style makes it perfectly suited for the graphic novel format.
The book is the story of a young woman discovering her own burgeoning homosexuality while circling the discoveries surrounding her mysterious father Bruce— a closeted gay man working as a high school English teacher AND a funeral home director. (The Title “FUN HOME” stands for “FUNeral Home—” uh… fun indeed)!
Bechdel ultimately comes out as a butch lesbian herself in the tale, which is at once both heart-wrenching, identifiable, and laugh out loud funny.
The graphic novel inspired the Tony-winning musical adapted by Lisa Kron and Jeanine Tesori. It was nominated for twelve Tony Awards, winning five, including Best Musical, was hailed a “masterpiece” by the New York Times, and has become a gold standard for what is possible in unconventional storytelling across genres.
2. We Are Never Meeting in Real Life. Essays by Samantha Irby
Samantha Irby writes a blog called bitches gotta eat. And it’s phenomenal. I’m a fan. The day she followed me back on Twitter was a big day. We Are Never Meeting in Real Life is an essay collection from the salty-worded blogger, writer on Hulu’s Shrill, and “one of our country’s most fierce and foulmouthed authors” (Amber Tamblyn, Vulture). Everything Irby produces is sure to make you simultaneously guffaw and choke on your very-real tears. Whether Samantha Irby is talking about how her challenging Midwestern childhood, her hateful cat named Helen Keller, detailing a disastrous pilgrimage-slash-romantic-vacation to Nashville to scatter her estranged father’s ashes, her absolutely painfully-on-the-money, poo-soaked journey with Chrohn’s Disease ( I relate boo!), sharing cringe-worthy pan-sexual encounters,
Samantha Irby is a master of nimbly taking the piss out of, and facing the brutal emotional realities of, every last skeleton in her closet.
I read both this, and her other collection of essay Meaty, on Audible, read by Irby’s own brilliant voice. Highly recommend.
FYI: Samantha Irby also has a new collection of essays coming out March 31 titled Wow, No Thank You.
3. Reading Lolita in Tehran: A Memoir in Books, by Azar Nafisi
Who knew how much courage it took just to open a book?
Azar Nafisi's memoir potently chronicles her experiences in what for many people across the globe is an ordinary gathering to be taken (almost) for granted: a Thursday morning women’s book club.
We all know that literature has the ability to transform lives, and that’s exactly what it did for Azar Nafisi and the seven young women she brought together at her home every week for two years before she left Iran in 1997.
While there, the young women would read and discuss forbidden works of Western literature like Pride and Prejudice and Lolita, whose stories ultimately interweave and parallel the reading women’s own lives in Iran during this violent and uncertain time.
While the club opened its members' minds and liberated them to speak freely among themselves, Nafisi's account opens the eyes of us, her reader, revealing to us the secret world of Iranian women that so many of us only guess at fueled by our fears and xenophobia.
These women become your friends, your fellow suffragists, and revolutionaries. But above all, they become your heroes. Reading Lolita in Tehran demonstrates why books truly do transform —including this one.
4. American Born Chinese by Gene Yuen Yang
Since meeting and falling in love with Alec (who is half Chinese), Chinese and Chinese American culture has become a source of infinite joy, wonder, and illumination for me. Not only am I learning some great Chinese children’s songs, but I’m also getting some hella-delish homemade dumplings here in quarantine, and thanks to him, I have been sporting a travel mask long before it was SO COOL YOU COULDN’T EVEN GET A MASK.
But anyway.
American Born Chinese is another offering from the world of graphic novel literature and was the winner of the 2007 Eisner Award for Best Graphic Album.
Gene Yuen Yang’s story intertwines three (seemingly!) independent stories of classic Chinese folklore, self-acceptance, and the long-felt confusion for “Other” cultures everywhere: assimilation.
These three tales are told through the eyes of Jin Wang, the Chinese folk legend the Monkey King, and an all-American white kid named Danny.
Yang breaks down the specific insecurities of growing up Chinese American, of dealing with issues of identity and self-worth in a systemically prejudiced world, not to mention all the regular horrors that come along with coming of age when you are, in any way, “Other.”
While the three stories seem unrelated, they are later revealed to be connected in a shocking, beautifully rendered, and powerful twist.
5. White Hot Grief Parade by … uh, me!
Dare I even suggest my own story? [Eep!]
So many of you watched “live” as WHGP developed here on London Still, and indeed, this platform is where I found my own writer’s voice. So much of WHGP is as much a love letter to my father and a chronicling of grief, as it is a love letter to this blog and all of you.
My publisher has this to say:
“A powerful and luminous story of grief and coming-of-age and a beautiful tribute to the relationship between a father and daughter.
Alexandra “Al” Silber seems to have everything: brilliance, beauty, and talent in spades. But when her beloved father dies after a decade-long battle with cancer when she is just a teenager, it feels like the end of everything. Lost in grief, Al and her mother hardly know where to begin with the rest of their lives. Into this grieving house burst Al’s three friends from theatre camp, determined to help out as only drama students know-how—and they’re moving in for the duration. Over the course of that winter, the now five-strong household will do battle with everything Death can throw at them—meddling relatives, merciless bureaucracy, soul-sapping sadness, the endless Tupperware. They will learn (almost) everything about love and will eventually return to the world, altered in different ways by their time in a home by a river. Told with raw passion, candor and wit, White Hot Grief Parade is an ode to the restorative power of family and friendship—and the unbreakable bond, even in death, between father and daughter.”
Feeling like a familiar voice? Let me read it to you on Audible! We can spend 10 or so hours together laughing and choking whilst cry-laughing.
This week, many of us will celebrate a Passover that is different from all other Passovers. Instead of inviting guests into our home — or heading out to attend someone else's sacred seder gathering— we will be huddled in our own homes, while a plague swirls outside. Much like our ancestors in Egypt who celebrated the first Passover in a state of anxiety and preparation, listening to sounds of death all around, we too experience Passover this year in a state of heightened worry, plague, and frantic anticipation. And like them, we hope for redemption in the morning.
Today, I offer you some unique and simple ways to think about and reinterpret Passover prayers and rituals for this unparalleled moment in our contemporary history.
Of course, it’d be wonderful if we could all find copies of the well-worn haggadot we’re used to reading from each year, but that’s not always possible in the virtual world! Zadie’s Haggadah isn’t accessible to us this year so what is the next best thing? A digital Haggadah!
I wrote this Haggadah last year for my Passover seder with my closest friends, and it was a huge hit. Minimal Hebrew (not that there is anything wrong with Hebrew of course! It is just that this experience can be more accessible for all! In my instance, I personally perform all the Hebrew parts with great pride and joy) and my secular and of-faith but non-Jewish best pals had a profound experience as we gathered together and read from this very collection of thoughts.
Last year: Passover, 2019
Some things become clearer when our world goes Quiet. When life as we knew it moves inward. Much like our ancestors of old, across the globe, we too in this moment of uncertainty are being asked to travel great distances to find safety and redemption. It is just that our journey today is not geographical, it is internal. The journey we are taking is ever-inward and one of self-reflection. That can be as harrowing as any geographic journey, and sometimes filled with far more confrontation and perceived danger.
“In quarantine and isolation, many of us are realizing, or admitting, what is true in our most intimate relationships. We notice how we feel about being home with our significant other for the indefinite future, or how we feel about being alone. We notice whether seeing a particular name pop up on our phones awakens anxiety or joy. Suddenly we can perceive who in our lives provides us comfort or a good laugh, which favorite foods or songs can carry us through a challenging time, or when we long for solitude.”
Recently, this photo was circulated across the media of two brave, essential, and inter-faith health workers in Israel. The photo is of these men pausing amidst the chaos of their emergency Coronavirus-related workload to pray next to their shared ambulance. One man is Jewish, draped in his tallit, the other man is Muslim, kneeling on his prayer rug— one faces Jerusalem, the other Mecca. This moment is shared, profound and sacred on a thousand immeasurable levels. These workers are the human beings who valiantly act from hope instead of fear, in their integrity and in their purpose. Like Moses, Miriam and Aaron, who led the Israelites out of Egypt, they are building relationships and coalitions in order to forge a pathway out of this crisis. They choose generosity and action, even at great personal cost or risk.
Here is to you, essential workers of the world: you are made up of all creeds, colors, and backgrounds, but we share the common root of the human being’s capacity to endure.
*
So let’s begin this Passover Seder!
Below is my own take on the Haggadah—with personal additions of my favorite poetry and prose to match the sentiments of the stages of the seder— for your own digital or in-person enjoyment.
Traditionally at the end of the Passover seder, we say “Next year in the Holy Land.”
This year, that holy land is back together. So I say (inspired by the beautiful online hashtag campaign by my new obsession, the extraordinary lifestyle blogger, “Made by Rebekah:”)
“Next year, in person.”
Amen.
*
INTRO
THE PASSOVER SEDER
The Passover Seder is one of the most important celebrations on the Jewish cultural calendar. It provides a setting of family love and unity in which all Jews can rededicate themselves to the ideal of human freedom and growth.
The ritual of the occasion involves the use of certain symbolic foods:
P'RI HA-GAPHEN "the fruit of the vine" - wine or grape juice
MATSAH unleavened bread
MAROR a bitter herb (horseradish, green onion, or romaine lettuce)
KARPAS parsley or celery
Z'ROAan animal bone or a beet (for vegetarians)
BEITSAH an egg, hard-boiled then roasted
TAPPUZ an orange (a recent addition)
HAROSET a condiment made from fruits, nuts, spices, and wine
WHY WE ARE TOGETHER TONIGHT
LEADER:
We have come together this evening for many reasons. We are here because Spring is all around, the Earth is reborn, and it is a good time to celebrate with family and friends. We are here because we are Jews, because we are members of the Jewish nation, with its deep historic roots and its valuable old memories and stories. We are here to remember the old story of the liberation of the ancient Hebrews from slavery in Egypt - a great struggle for freedom and dignity. We are here because the struggle for human freedom never stops. We are here to remember all people - Jews and non-Jews - who are still struggling for their freedom.
ALL: Behold, how good and how pleasant it is when peoples* dwell together in unity!
*
this year? use whatever you've got!
1. NEROT - CANDLES
LEADER: Let us begin!
[Begin taking turns reading. Each person is invited to read a grouped set of lines - or to pass.]
◆ It is said, there is nothing new under the sun, yet nothing remains the same.
◆ Against the backdrop of eternity, the earth displays an ever-changing countenance. The sun rises and the sun sets, yet each day and each season is fresh and new.
◆ Slowly, one season emerges from another. The harshness of ice and snow yields to gentle, nourishing showers.
◆ Inevitably, the cold, dark days succumb to the warmth and light of Spring.
◆ We rejoice in the warm light and rich blessings of this season.
◆ The celebration of Passover represents the perennial rebirth and survival of the Jewish people and the world of nature.
◆ The light of these candles symbolizes a renewal of life, a reaffirmation of freedom.
READING:
“I
learned without her saying a word that there are truly many ways to
pray, and lighting a candle is one of them.” ― Pat Schneider
ALL: Let us bless the light as we gather together to kindle the festival candles. With the light of liberation let us bless life.
[The candles are lit.]
*
L'Chaim you guys!
2. KIDDUSH - DEDICATION - THE 1ST CUP OF THE FRUIT OF THE VINE
LEADER: Let us all fill our glasses with the fruit of the vine.
[Resume taking turns reading. Each person is invited to read a grouped set of lines - or to pass!]
◆ Spring is the season of new growth and new life. Every living thing must either grow or die; growth is a sign and a condition of life.
◆ Human beings are perhaps unique among the Earth's inhabitants. Our most significant growth takes place inwardly. We grow as we achieve new insights, new knowledge, new goals.
◆ Let us raise our cups to signify our gratitude for life, and for the joy of knowing inner growth, which gives human life its meaning.
READING [this is the traditional Hebrew prayer, the transliteration, and the English translation]:
Attention, gentlemen, [rabbis, and my teachers]! Blessed are You,
Lord our God, King of the universe, who creates the fruit of the vine.
(Amen)
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, Who chose us from all the nations, and elevated us above all tongues, and sanctified us with His commandments. And You gave us, Lord our God, with love,
[Sabbaths for rest and] festivals for happiness, holidays and times for
joy, this day of the Festival of Matzos, the time of our freedom
◆ Together, with raised cups, let us say: The fruit of the vine - with it, let us drink "To Life!"
ALL: “L’Chaim!”
*
"A Mac-a-baby's gotta do what a Mac-a-baby's gotta DO!"
3. THE MEANING OF THE PASSOVER STORY
LEADER: Passover is the celebration of life.
The story of the Jewish people is truly a triumph of life. Against the odds of history, the Jewish people have done more than merely survive - we have adapted creatively to each new time, each new place, from the birth of our people to the present day.
[Resume taking turns reading. Each person is invited to read a grouped set of lines - or to pass!]
◆ Even though death has pursued us relentlessly, time and time again, we have chosen to live.
◆ During the many centuries of the Jewish experience, memories of destruction are tempered by the knowledge that the world can also be good.
◆ We have endured slavery and humiliation. We have also enjoyed freedom and power. Darkness has been balanced by light.
◆ Our forebears traveled the Earth in search of the safety and liberty they knew must exist. We have learned to endure. We have learned to progress. We are proud survivors.
READING, from After Anatevka:
“Human
life is to be lived, my sons,” said the rabbi to the whole group once
more. “The Israelites are told to ‘choose life.’ They are promised a
long and fruitful life if they abide by God’s commandments. If the
purpose of life is to live it, then the Exodus from Egypt is a journey
from death into life—from a culture that focuses beyond this world to
one that embraces it. And thus the theological questions changes too, as
we ask whether a God who loves life would ask God’s children to throw
their gifts away in any kind of slavery. Do you see?”
LEADER: We celebrate our good fortune and seek the advancement of all oppressed peoples.
ALL: Here here [or, Amen.]
*
4. MAGGID - STORY-TELLER
[Take turns reading.]
LEADER: Let us tell a story of Jewish hope.
◆ The tale of our people's first quest for freedom from slavery in Egypt was written so long ago that no one knows how much of it is fact and how much is fiction. Like all good stories, however, its moral lessons are valid and important.
◆ It is written that long ago, during a time of famine, the ancient Israelites traveled to Egypt. According to this legend, the Israelites at that time were all in a single-family - Jacob and his children. One of Jacob's sons was Joseph. He was so wise that the ruler of Egypt - the Pharaoh - made Joseph a leader over all the people of Egypt. But as time passed, another Pharaoh became the ruler of Egypt. He did not remember Joseph and his wise leadership.
◆ This new Pharaoh turned the Israelites into slaves and burdened them with heavy work and sorrow. After the Israelites were in Egypt for over 400 years, a man named Moses arose among them. He demanded that Pharaoh let his people go! Many times he risked his life to insist on the freedom of his people until he finally succeeded. At our Passover Seder, we celebrate the story of Moses and the people he led out of slavery 3000 years ago. We celebrate the struggle of all people to be free.
◆ Throughout the centuries, the story of Moses and the exodus from Egypt has inspired Jews and non-Jews in times of persecution and hardship.
◆ Let us remember that the thirst for freedom exists in all people.
◆ Many centuries after the legendary time of Moses, African people were brought to America as slaves. These slaves longed for freedom, and they were inspired by the story of Moses and the ancient Israelites.
LEADER: The freedom we celebrate tonight is not only freedom from slavery. It is also the freedom to live in peace, with dignity and with hope for a bright future. This constant vision has inspired the Jewish people since ancient times when the Bible was written.
◆ For centuries, most Jews lived in Europe, where they were often persecuted. They were driven from place to place, and their lives were often filled with terror and despair. There came a time when many Jewish families learned of a place called America, where people could live without fear. This was the promise that America held out to them and to many other suffering people. By the thousands, and then by the millions, year after year they crossed a large ocean.
◆ Enduring separation from all they had known, they faced the dangers of a long voyage before reaching the shores of America. For a time, many suffered from poverty and disease. Yet their courage, perseverance, and skills helped to advance the freedoms that we celebrate here tonight.
◆ This evening, as we celebrate our own freedom let us take notice of the on-going struggles toward freedom here and in many other parts of the world. Let us celebrate all these struggles, with our ultimate American freedom poem, which is a prayer for America being (and remaining), a country of welcome:
READING -
"The New Colossus" By Emma Lazarus
Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame, With conquering limbs astride from land to land; Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame. “Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”
* * *
PART 2
5. OUR PLEASURE DIMINISHED BY THE PAIN OF OTHERS
LEADER: Let us all refill our cups. [refill your wine, whee!]
My "Plagues of Egypt" eggs (because I hate feeling left out...)
Tonight we drink four cups of the fruit of the vine. There are many explanations for this custom. They may be seen as symbols of various things: the four corners of the earth, for freedom, must live everywhere; the four seasons of the year, for freedom's cycle must last through all the seasons; or the four matriarchs: Sarah, Rebecca, Leah, and Rachel.
A full cup of wine symbolizes complete happiness.
The triumph of Passover is diminished by the sacrifice of many human lives when ten plagues were visited upon the people of Egypt.
In the story, the plagues that befell the Egyptians resulted from the decisions of tyrants, but the greatest suffering occurred among those who had no choice but to follow. It is fitting that we mourn their loss of life, and express our sorrow over their suffering. For as Jews and as Humanists we cannot take joy in the suffering of others.
Therefore, let us diminish the wine in our cups as we recall the ten plagues that befell the Egyptian people.
As we recite the name of each plague, in English and then in Hebrew, please dip a finger in your wine and then touch your plate to remove the drop.
In the same spirit, our celebration today also is shadowed by our awareness of continuing sorrow and oppression in all parts of the world. Ancient plagues are mirrored in modern tragedies. In our own time, as in ancient Egypt, ordinary people suffer and die as a result of the actions of the tyrants who rule over them. While we may rejoice in the defeat of tyrants in our own time, we must also express our sorrow at the suffering of the many innocent people who had little or no choice but to follow.
LEADER: As the pain of others diminishes our joys, let us once more diminish the ceremonial drink of our festival as we together recite the names of these modern plagues:
Hunger
Last year: at the Winter Palace
War
Tyranny
Greed
Bigotry
Injustice
Hatred
Violence
Intolerance
Poverty
Abuse of Animals (and those who cannot verbally speak for themselves)
Ignorance
Inequality
Pollution of the Earth
Indifference to Suffering
and, this year of 2020 in particular:
Global Pandemic and Plague
LEADER: Let us visit a poem expressing hope:
READING:
"The Hope I Know" by Thomas Centolella, 2017
The Hope I know doesn’t come with feathers. It lives in flip-flops and, in cold weather, a hooded sweatshirt, like a heavyweight in training, or a monk who has taken a half-hearted vow of perseverance. It only has half a heart, the hope I know. The other half it flings to every stalking hurt. It wears a poker face, quietly reciting the laws of probability, and gladly takes a back seat to faith and love, it’s that many times removed from when it had youth on its side and beauty. Half the world wishes to stay as it is, half to become whatever it can dream, while the hope I know struggles to keep its eyes open and its mind from combing an unpeopled beach. Congregations sway and croon, constituents vote across their party line, rescue parties wait for a break in the weather. And who goes to sleep with a prayer on the lips or half a smile knows some kind of hope. Though not the hope I know, which slinks from dream to dream without ID or ally, traveling best at night, keeping to the back roads and the shadows, approaching the radiant city without ever quite arriving.
*
6. THE SECOND CUP DEDICATED TO THE STRUGGLE FOR PEACE AND FREEDOM
[Take turns reading.]
LEADER: The second cup of wine is dedicated not only to the struggles of the Jewish people, but to all people seeking a secure life free of fear and persecution. We hope and work particularly for the Israelis and the Palestinians that they may all learn to live together in freedom and peace—but also our own broken country of Left and Right.
READING: Let us strive to fulfill the words of the prophet Micah:
"They shall beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks. Nation shall not take up sword against nation, they shall never again know war. But they shall sit every one under their vines and fig trees, and none shall make them afraid" (Micah 4.3-4).
LEADER: Let us all raise our glasses in a toast to peace and freedom for all:
ALL: "To Peace and Freedom!"
LEADER: And now it is time to answer the FOUR questions about what makes this night different from all other nights!
*
7. ARBA QUSHYOT - FOUR QUESTIONS!
LEADER: One of the customs of the seder is the asking of questions - questions about what the ritual actions of the seder mean. The Passover tradition involves the youngest children asking - actually singing - about these matters. (If there aren't any kids, no problem. Just peer pressure the youngest person present to do the asking. Last year, Alec was the youngest person in attendance and he asked the questions with very little grumpiness and to great aplomb...)
1Q. Why is this night different from all other nights?
1A: On all other nights we eat either bread or matzah.
2Q. Why, on this night, do we eat only matzah?
2A. On all other nights we eat herbs of any kind.
3Q. Why, on this night, do we eat only bitter herbs? Why, on this night, do we dip them twice?
3A. On all other nights, we do not dip our herbs even once.
4Q. Why, on this night, do we eat while leaning?
4A. On all other nights, we eat either sitting or leaning.
ANSWERS!!!
MATZAH - UNLEAVENED BREAD [Matsah held up for all to see.]
LEADER:
1. Why is this night different from all other nights? Why, on this night, do we eat only matzah?
[Take turns reading]
Matzah is the symbol of our affliction and our freedom.
Legend has it that when Moses and his followers fled Egypt, they moved so quickly that the bread they baked did not have time to rise.
However, scholars have noted that long before the Jews celebrated Passover, Middle Eastern farmers celebrated a spring festival of unleavened bread.
This was a festival where unleavened bread was made from the fresh barley grain newly harvested at this time of the year.
The old fermented dough was thrown out so that last year's grain would not be mixed with this year's.
Therefore, the new season began with the eating of unleavened bread - matzah.
Later on, the Jewish people incorporated this agricultural festival into the celebration of freedom and renewal we now call Passover.
LEADER: Let us now say a blessing for the matzah! Let us bring forth matzah - food from the land - so we all may be satisfied and sustained.
Let us all now eat a piece of matzah!
[All eat] MAROR - THE BITTER HERB - [Maror held up for all to see.]
LEADER:
2. Why, on this night, do we eat only bitter herbs? Why, on this night, do we dip them twice?
[Take turns reading.]
Why do we eat maror?
Tradition says that this bitter herb is to remind us of the time of our slavery.
We force ourselves to taste pain so that we may more readily value pleasure.
Scholars inform us that bitter herbs were eaten at spring festivals in ancient times.
The sharpness of the taste awakened the senses and made the people feel at one with nature's revival.
Thus, maror is the stimulus of life, reminding us that struggle is better than the complacent acceptance of injustice.
LEADER: As a blessing for the maror, let us all sing this song about striving to be fully human. Then we will all take a taste of horseradish on a piece of matzah.
BLESSING: Where people are less than human, strive to be fully human.
DIPPING GREENS IN SALTWATER MATBILIN KARPAS
LEADER:
3. Why do we dip our food in saltwater two times on this night? The first time, the salty taste reminds us of the tears we cried when we were slaves. [Greens held up for all to see.]
Parsley and celery are symbols of all kinds of spring greenery.
The second time, the saltwater and the green can help us to remember the ocean and green plants and the Earth, from which we get the water and air and food that enable us to live.
LEADER: Let us bless the fruit of the Earth. [Please dip your parsley into saltwater two times and eat it.]
M'SUBIN - LEANING
LEADER:
4. Why, on this night, do we eat while leaning?
[take turns reading]
Why do we eat while leaning on this night? In ancient Rome, rich people used to eat while lying on a couch leaning on one elbow as slaves and servants fed them. Some ancient Jews saw this relaxed type of eating as a sign of freedom and prosperity, so they would lean to one side eating at the seder on Passover, the festival of freedom. Some modern Jews, working with others, helped create greater liberty and well-being for the world. Today, we celebrate freedom and equality by sitting up and feeding ourselves, but the leaning question remains in the service as a reminder of how it was when our people longed for freedom.
* MORE QUESTIONS!
We have now answered the four traditional questions! But there are still more questions to be answered.
There are other special foods on our Seder plate:
a bone (z'roa)
and a beet,
a roasted egg (beitsah)
and an orange, and, many people's favorite, the sweet condiment (haroset).
Why are they here?
Z'ROA can mean a shank bone - the bone of a forelimb - or a vegetable. This lamb's bone is the symbol of the ancient shepherd's festival of Pesah or Passover. It was celebrated at the time of the full moon in the month lambs and goats were born. At that time, each family would sacrifice a young lamb or goat at a spring feast. Jews ended these sacrifices when the Jerusalem Temple was destroyed. Since z'roa also means vegetable, a beet can be used instead of an animal bone on the seder plate. The Jewish people are very diverse, so the rabbis who wrote the Talmud acknowledged this vegetarian alternative.
BEITSAH - EGG
Beitsah is the egg of life, a symbol of the birth of the young in spring. Each of us begins as an egg and grows to adulthood. The egg reminds us of our evolutionary past and of the gifts of human inheritance. But the egg is fragile. It represents potential that can be destroyed. Left alone, its life would perish. Growing life needs warmth and love and security, guidance, hope, and vision. To achieve their full potential, human beings need the support and encouragement of family and community. Beitsah symbolizes the fragility and interdependence of life.
[All who so desire may now eat a piece of egg.]
TAPPUZ - ORANGE
We place this fruit among our ceremonial foods as a symbol of our efforts to make sexual minorities feel acknowledged in our community. We recognize the contributions made by these family members and friends. By inviting and welcoming all with open hearts and open minds, we celebrate diversity and freedom. We put an orange on our seder plate as a new symbol of liberation around sexuality and gender roles.
[All may eat a piece of orange.]
HAROSET - CONDIMENT
Fruits, nuts, spices, and wine are combined to make this sweet condiment. Being the color of clay or mortar, it reminds us of the bricks and mortar used by slaves - Jews and others - in building the Pharaohs' palaces and cities. Yet the taste of haroset is sweet, and thus reminds us of the sweetness of freedom. Leader: Let us now all eat haroset on a piece of matzah. We now make a little sandwich - called a "korekh" or a "Hillel sandwich;" tradition credits Rabbi Hillel with creating this sandwich 2000 years ago. By eating some bitter herb (maror) and some haroset between two pieces of matzah, you can taste the "bittersweet" meaning of Passover.
◆ During this festival of life, let us remember our lost sisters and brothers - the millions of Jews enslaved and killed in the Holocaust. We remember them along with all the others who suffered.
◆ They were all parts of the rainbow - of ethnic, religious and sexual minorities, of progressive activists, resistance fighters, and people with disabilities. Their experiences of anguish and death are with us, even in our times of celebration. We resolve that their memory shall not be lost.
◆ We accept the responsibility of working to prevent such suffering from ever again occurring on this earth. We remember the heroism of those who fought against fascism and tyranny in the forests and the cities of Europe. Men, women, and children who loved freedom and humanity struggled with their own hands against the powerful armies of those who sought to oppress and kill them.
LEADER: We were slaves in Egypt and we were slaves in fascist Europe— and an ever-growing Fascist world today. We have much to remember. Let us raise our glasses to those who were taken from us, for those who are currently threatened still today, and to those who fought and continue to fight for freedom and life.
ALL: "L'Chaim!"
[All drink the third cup.]
*
9. FOR A BETTER WORLD - THE FOURTH CUP
LEADER: Let us all refill our cups. [Leader picks up the cup for all to see.]
This is the cup of hope. The seder tradition involves pouring a cup for the Hebrew prophet Elijah. For millennia, Jews opened the door for him, inviting him to join their seders, hoping that he would bring with him a messiah to save the world.
Yet the tasks of saving the world - once ascribed to prophets, messiahs, and gods - must be taken up by us mere mortals, by common people with shared goals. Working together for progressive change, we can bring about the improvement of the world, tiqqun ha-olam - for justice and for peace, we can and we must.
ALL: Let us make peace in the world.
LEADER: Peace is our responsibility, the responsibility of all peoples in the world.
ALL: Let there be peace for us all.
LEADER: Let us now symbolically open the door of our seder to invite in all people of goodwill and all those in need to work together with us for a better world.
READING:
"The Guest House" by Rumi
This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes As an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they're a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
LEADER: Let us raise our fourth cup as we dedicate ourselves to the improvement of the world.
[All drink fourth cup.]
*
10. YAHATS - BREAKING THE MATSAH
LEADER: We have drunk the wine and tasted the special foods of the Passover celebration. To remind us of these values as we go back out into the world, at the end of our festival meal, we shall return to have a final taste of matzah - our symbol of suffering and liberation, of renewal in nature and humanity.
I am breaking this matzah into two pieces.
One half I will return to the table.
[Leader breaks matzah, sets down half, and holds up half as the `afikoman.]
The other half I will wrap in a napkin and save until the end of the meal. This piece is called the `APHIQOMAN - Without it, the seder cannot end, so I must make sure that it does not get lost. Of course, I am very forgetful, so I may need help finding it if I do misplace it. In fact, I manage to lose it every year - it ends up seemingly "hidden.” So just figure that I'll be asking all you younger folks to help me find it pretty soon.
*
11. DINNER!
LEADER: Now it is time for our leisurely Pesah meal.
LEADER: [Announces the name of the child or children who found the `afikoman.]
Let us continue our seder by eating one last little piece of matzah to leave us with the taste of freedom's struggles. [Everyone eats a last piece of matzah!]
Now, let us conclude our seder...
LEADER:
We have recalled struggles against slavery and injustice.
We have sung of freedom and peace.
We revisited times of persecution and times of fulfillment.
Only half a century ago, Nazis committed the crimes of the Holocaust.
Today, as Human Beings living in the United States in the 21st Century, we take for granted that we are freer than at any other time.
Yet Jewish history shows that life is ever-changing, and we must learn how to survive under all conditions.
When we are persecuted, we must struggle for our own freedom.
The more freedom we attain, the more we must help others attain freedom.
This is the lesson of Passover.
This is why we celebrate the Festival of Freedom.
LEADER: Let us now conclude our celebration of Life, of Freedom, and of Peace by standing to listen to say: NEXT YEAR, PEACE! NEXT YEAR IN THE HOLY LAND!
ALL: NEXT YEAR, PEACE! NEXT YEAR IN THE HOLY LAND!
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