Wintro-vert

It took me a couple of years into my adulthood to really understand why I always felt so exhausted at parties— personal or professional.  Then one day, inspired by her incredible TED Talk I read Quiet by Susan Cain, and I realized: oh. Right, HELLO—Thank you Susan Cain—I’m an introvert. (An INFJ, to be precise, should you be in the Myers Briggs mindset).

I’m sure I am not the first to thank the pro-Introvert movement for helping me recognize and respect myself.

Dear readers, Hi there. My name is Alexandra Silber and I am an Introvert.

No, I am not aloof.
No, I am not shy,
     or antisocial.
Or people-hating.

YES, despite having extraordinary extrovert skills, I am an Introvert. 
And if you suspect you are one too, this brilliantly curated site ‘Introvert, Dear’ could not be more illuminating and celebratory of our true nature.
(Also? I know I am an actress with a lot of personality when I AM in public but… those are highly honed SKILLS, not nature. Please don’t tell me I am NOT an introvert. Please don’t assume you know me better than I know me. Don’t ever do this to anyone.)

In an extrovert-rewarding world that favors the outgoing and the gregarious, being an introvert can be difficult. We are assumed to be many a negative thing simply for being quiet (aloof, shy, anti-social, misanthropic and smug, being a handful of them). But the truth is that introverts are the world’s “watchers” and “listeners”— and have distinct advantages — as long as they know how to use them, and hopefully, the world comes to appreciate them.

Unlike extroverts, who draw their energy from social interactions, introverts gather their energy and recharge their batteries in (sweet, sweet) solitude, and gain hugely from quiet reflection.

I think winter is the season for introverts. It’s the time of year when Mother Nature begs us to rest, to slow down, to reflect. The world around us seems to take a collective breath, take time for quiet, deep reflection. It feels like the only time of year when humanity says it is socially acceptable to hole away at home—a state introverts enjoy immensely.

Thus, I have termed myself a “WINTROVERT.”

For when the days grow short and the temperatures plunge, the following virtues are at their peak:

Curling up for no particular reason
A long solo walk through the snow on a sunny winter’s day— the crisp, cold air filling my lungs!
Disappear under a blanket or three,
Make endless crockpots full of delicious soup.
Drink pots of hot beverages (sometimes in very cute teapots)

• Get lost in a good book.
• Binge-watch all twelve seasons of Murder, She Wrote.
• Nobody expects you to leave the house. In fact, often, they insist you don’t (for once, cancelling plans due to it being “WINTER AF” outside is the right thing to do).
• Staying put and hunkering down. A day to hibernate in your home and a reason to leave the rest of the world out in the blizzard. Nowhere to be. Time to watch the gentle flakes fall to the ground and marvel at the frozen beauty surrounding you.
• There is something particularly satisfying about cooking and eating warm winter food from the comfort of your warm kitchen as a storm swirls outside.
• Fireplace + book. No explanation required.
• Netflix + couch. From late November to Mid-March, this is an actual destination.
• Candles are cozier and even more atmospheric.
• Winter is nature’s resting time—a very special hush comes over the world as the days grow short and the earth rests.
• Winter makes one cocooned inside and splendidly alone. Trust me when I say that for introverts? THIS IS DAMN WONDERFUL.
• Come on: SNOW IS AMAZING. We learned this from The King and I and we probably won’t have snow much longer because climate change.
• It’s exciting when the outside world feels so dangerous and I am safely sitting on an armchair, slipping my finger between the dusty blinds, peeking at the slippery chaos.
• Winter is the time for crafty projects, homemade food, daydreams and catching up with yourself (to cabin fever I am permanently immune!)
• Zero FOMO, because everyone else is also trapped inside. I have an excuse for doing nothing at night and eating chips from the bag and writing writing writing.

    As much as I enjoy the vibrant colors of spring, warmer days mean it is time to come back out and rejoin the world. The time of rest has come to an end. I shall savor every chilly moment until the final snowflake has melted into the budding crocuses.