18 April, 2010

Capturing the Zeitgeist, Part Four: One Last Hurrah

I feel inclined, on Ms DePalma's final day of performance, to share with you one last Sophie Hurrah. She will be missed, but clearly she shall continue to live on... perhaps in her very own Vegas show... you never know... her off stage persona gets a lot of air time... clearly...

Future possibility:

Sophie DePalma: A Road Trip with Sharon
     [includes preliminary scenes composed yesterday with Laquita that go roughly like this:


Sophie: Hi Sharon, um... I heard you live in Ohio and I live in Michigan so maybe we could roadtrip it back together after the semester is over...? I have a car, pop some Rossini in the tape-deck and ride into the Midwest together? ...

Sharon: [pause] No.


Sophie: Hi there Sharon

Sharon: [silence]

Sophie: Okay. Well sooooooo sorry to bother you about this but could I borrow your Norma score? I'm working on Teneri figli and was studying in the bath and whoops! dropped it in and I have a coaching in an hour and.. you know... it would be soooo great if you would lend me yours and I'll give it right back safe and sound I promise! [smiles]

Sharon: [eyes wide, not blinking, stares at her in total whyareyoueventalkingtome astonishment] No.

[she walk away, and just before she turns a corner--] and girl, you should stop studying in the bath!

After these scenes Sharon's flight is cancelled due to apocalyptic winter weather and she concedes to go with Sophie on the road trip in order to make it back to Ohio in time for Christmas... with hilaaaaaarious consequences! Thoughts?

And other possibilities include:

Sophie DePalma and the Lost Umbrella 

Sophie DePalma: Down Under

Sophie on the Roof

Sophie DePalma's SCHOOL OF ROCK

Sophie Knows What You Did Last Summer 

Sophie at the Bat

Are you there God? It's me Sophie.

Sophie DePalma  Explains it All For You

Basically, Sophie DePalma is the gift that keeps on giving...


And a final word from Genius and Director Stephen Wadsworth [pictured left]:

"Sophie takes out full-page advertisement in New York Times (paid for by her Russian mafia sabrillionaire boyfriend): SOPHIE DE PALMA, STUDENT OF MARIA CALLAS, NOW OFFERING VOICE LESIONS.

Only after it goes to press does someone bring her attention to the fact that it says lesions and not lessons.

She is however contacted by several late-career singers looking for a way to wind down.  She succeeds in giving them vocal lesions through the same exercises she used for vocal lessons, they file for workman's compensation on their last job, her husband pays their legal bills, and she becomes quite famous for destroying voices on a tight schedule.  Late in life, after her trial in the Hague on charges of genocide, she tells the Washington Post, "There are so many teachers out there building voices, I thought it would be good to help people destroy them.  I mean, what are you going to do with a great big voice if you're just going to end up in a little room in an old people's home?  Where are you going to put it.  Do you really think the family is going to STORE it?"


Farewell Sophie DePalma: You were not only a lovely, well-meaning, sensitive girl capable of such depth and feeling... you were also a hell of a hoot. Don't be a stranger.

Over and out.


  1. sending you good thoughts on wings and more umbrellas than you could ever possibly forget

  2. wish I could see it again!!!!

  3. So sad!...But it was wonderful to see you and catch up! Look forward to doing it again soon =)

  4. do you get to keep the pencil as well as the clogs? :)

  5. Tear. I shall miss you Sophie DePalma.

  6. tears from me too. she will be missed! but congrats and love to you!

  7. sean smithApril 21, 2010

    "Sophie & Chair"
    "Sophie, So Good"
    "Mere Sophie-stry"

    ... I'm here all week!



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