Photography: Study in Blue

Study in Blue
Oxford, England, July 2006
Model: Karen Ann Light

Karen is a dancer I found in Oxford whilst visiting my friend Alley for the weekend. I saw her and instantly felt inspired. She is a deeply passionate woman, and this photographic process was very much a shared creative experience. As you can see, her intensity, focus and unusual piercing beauty make her photograph like a dream.



www.alexandrasilberphotography.com

Fuerzabruta

Kit took me.
The (RE)Opening of The Roundhouse. A great big deal.
And I was there.
But I wasn't.
The dark water had me.
And then Fuerzabruta took me under with it, and taught me about drowning.
It is sometimes necessary.
Else how would we know to fight, and remember exactly what we are fighting for?

Bastille Day at the French Embassy

Kit was invited and needed a swanky guest (me!). Knightsbridge. Embossed invitations. Full security detail. SWANK!

Bastille Day is the French national holiday, celebrated on 14 July each year. In France, it is called la Fête Nationale. It commemorates the 1790 Fête de la Fédération, held on the first anniversary of the storming of the Bastille on 14 July 1789; the anniversary of the storming of the Bastille was seen as a symbol of the uprising of the modern French nation, and of the reconciliation of all the French inside the constitutional monarchy which preceded the First Republic, during the French Revolution. I know this because I received a full colour handbook about the event in both French and English. Bon. C'est fantastique.

Highlights included an Eifel Tower made of baguette.
A Tour de Triumph made of mereigue.
SO. MUCH. FOOD. that was very very small.
Red, white and blue flower arrangements (blue flowers = dyed carnations)
Many many women with perfect hair.
And many many men who shrugged Gallic-ly.

Verrrrrry civilized.

Then I got caught at the food table with a very boring Englishman who wanted to discuss the American deficit.
Then he wanted to talk about how much he loved squash, and how all people that didn't love squash were stupid.
Then I excused myself as politely as possible by pretending I knew someone across the... tent.
And whilst running away from him, I then proceeded to accidentally ambushed the Ambassador's wife in the WC.
"Pardon! Pardon Madame! Je suis désolé!"
Then Kit saved me from certain death and we hastily left.
Coffee.
Laughter.
Lovely. As usual.

Vive la France.

Conversations with Kandinsky

Murnau Street with Women, 1908. Oil on cardboard

Lonely today.

Went to the Kandinsky exhibit opening at Tate Modern with Kit. The Exhibit was stunning, stirring. But the truth is, I am still unbearably scattered, broken, sucked under by the black water. The sky outside the large, imposing windows of the Tate's main gallery was decidedly menacing.

I am pleased to know Kit. He has brought serious meaning to my life at present. Totally different to any other person I have ever known. We manage to attend some wonderful artistic events together (from Orfeo to Fuerzabruta to Avenue Q), and talking with him is an indescribable pleasure. Sometimes I think the universe sends us people, and Kit and I seem to need one another in the midst of a sometimes cruel and faceless London. We've found our "guide," if you will, for this part of the journey.

I love Kandinsky. I like everything about him. His life, his birthplace (December 4, 1866, Moscow), his personal choices, and artistic integrity (in the form of the group Der Blaue Reiter at the Bauhaus).

He was often called the "Father of Abstract Art." Kandinsky trained as a lawyer in his native Russia, but discovered his true calling was in visual art. When and his wife moved to Germany, he studied art, while Mrs. Kandinsky filed for divorce. He went on to found the group Der Blaue Reiter and taught at the Bauhaus, always writing prolifically on the connections between art, music and spirituality (and found time to marry again). Much of his work was destroyed, as "degenerate", by the Nazi party.

He has some brilliant quotes:

"Every artist, as creator, must learn to express what is personally characteristic."
-- (The element of personality.)

"Every artist, as a child of his era, must express what is characteristic of this age."
-- (The element of style in its interior value, consisting of the language of the times and the language of the people.)

"Every artist, as servant of the art, must express that which is characteristic of art generally."
-- (The element of pure and eternal art, found among all human beings, among all peoples and at all times, and which appears in the work of all artists of all nations and in all ages and which does not obey, as essential element of art, any law of space or time.)

I fell in to his paintings. My limp, flimsy spirit fell head first into his spiritual world, in to his connection to something greater despite extreme adversity. And Kandinsky lightened me, lifted me up, released the burden, even if only for a moment. There is hope, there is always hope...

Welcome Hannah...

I'm an Aunt!

Hannah Virginia Silber born 29 May, 2006.
7 pounds, 10 ounces. 20 inches long.

What is there to say to describe the feeling of being someone's only aunt (or uncle for that matter). And in this particular case, Jordan and Maggie both being "only children" (aside from the very obvious fact that I am Jordan's sister but that is perhaps too complicated to get into right now), I am the only Aunt or Uncle Hannah is ever going to have.

So I better be good.
I have to get her the important books. And make sure I read them to her with all the voices.
I have to make sure she goes to the theatre!
I have to be the cool aunt, the crazy aunt and the faraway aunt all at once!

But I do love that J & M are going to be able to say to people in elevators: "Yes isn't that outfit nice? It was given to us by her Aunt, she is an actress in London's West End." That is fab. Well at least it will be fab when I am employed again. Ha!

But what joy.
An Aunt.
Forever.
It's forever.
And I love it.

Condensed Film Scripts: The Last Samurai

In case any of you missed this uh, AWESOME film, I thought I would save you the trouble of having to endure it. Life is too short. (This might have to made a serial...)

The Last Samurai

MAN: Please go to Japan and show them your awesome ways!
[wields sword with awesomeness]

TOM CRUISE: I will be better than all the stupid Japanese Samurai 'cos I am awesome.

SAMURAI: You fight so awesomely well that we will train you to be the best Samurai!

TOM CRUISE: Yes, I am that friggin' awesome.

[later...]

TOM CRUISE: I have become the best Samurai ever, and am totally more Samurai than the rest.

GIRL: I love you whitey Samurai.

The End.

Another note from Simon...

Simon kindly agreed to help with my visa application. A tumultuous task. He handed me the formal paper version of his letter whilst I was busy dissintergrating after the final performance of The Woman in White, which he kindly returned to witness. The next day I received this e-mail from him:

Dearest Creature, ex-Laura and Soon-to-be-Diva sublime,

Here is my little note. I will have delivered it to you in person tonight, but in case under the weight of all the emotion it got mislaid, or perhaps melted, here's what I wrote.

God bless you, sweet child.

Simon x

What a gem. What a marvellous man!

Behind the Scenes - The Woman in White

A photographic recap of the last 10 months. What a journey.

A Green Life

A Greener Life

Every day you are using water and energy, and creating waste. That means, every day you are impacting the environment. These tips will help you make choices with the good of the environment in mind.

* * *

Energy

- Conserve fuel by turning down the heat at night and while you are away from your home — or install a programmable thermostat. Turning down your thermostat by just 1°C could cut your carbon dioxide emissions by over 5% as well as saving you around £30 per year. Over 60% of our household carbon dioxide emissions are due to the fossil fuels (such as natural gas) which we burn to heat our homes. By taking a number of sensible steps we can reduce the heat we use, save money on our bills and substantially reduce our emissons.

- Use compact fluorescent light bulbs. They are inexpensive, and easy to install. Energy saving light bulbs last up to 12 times longer than normal bulbs, so each one can reduce your lighting costs by up to £78 over the lifetime of the bulb. There's a wide range of attractive designs now available and they emit 70% less carbon dioxide than normal bulbs. This is one of the easiest ways to make a difference!

- Insulate your home against heat loss and periodically check insulation. Insulating your house is one of the most effective ways of reducing your carbon dioxide emissions. For the average house 30% of the heat simply escapes through the walls and is wasted. You can also insulate your loft, floors and windows too.

- Fix air leakage with weather-stripping and caulking.

- In the winter, change your furnace air filters once a month. The heater uses more energy when it is full of dust.

- Avoid using cars and airplanes — walk, cycle or use public transportation whenever possible. The way you choose to travel significantly effects your impact on climate change. On average each us in the UK pours 3.3 tonnes of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere each year from our personal car usage and a further 1.3 tonnes from our aircraft flights. It's unlikely to be practical for us to give up our cars and stop flying altogether, but we can make a significant difference by thinking about the choices we make and weighing up other options for how we get around.

- Avoid anything battery operated (or use rechargables or solar rechargables if batteries are unavoidable).

- Buy locally — not only is it good for the local economy, it will save energy because products haven’t traveled across the globe to get to you. Also keep seasonal foods in mind. Again, people aren't really meant to eat fresh strawberries in January, it means they have travelled a great distance and used a considerable a,ount of jet fuel to get to you, whilst losing a huge amount of nutrients along the way.

Waste
If everyone consumed the way we do in the UK we would need 3 planet earths!

Our contribution to climate change doesn't just come from our travel, our electricity use and our heating. In fact almost everything we do in our lives involves products or services that have consumed energy to be made or transported, thus emitting carbon dioxide and causing climate change.

We can have a huge positive impact by aiming to live and consume in a "sustainable" way. What's more we won't just make a difference by our own lifestyles, but also from the influence we have on others.

- Don't buy things you don't really need or want.Most of us far more 'stuff' than we ever need. Every time you buy a product you're responsible for the emissions due to its manufacture, packaging and transport. So only buy stuff you really need or will actually use.

- Buy local food to avoid unnecessary "food miles." When you buy food from overseas you're responsible for the "food miles" incurred by shipping that product to the UK. Why not reduce your impact on climate change by buying local produce instead? It tastes better too!

- Buy organic or grow your own. Conventional intensive farming methods use 25-50% more energy than organic farming per unit of product. Buying organic or growing your own significantly reduces your impact on climate change.

- Use a vegetable compost at home. Using a compost for organic waste is easy and avoids it decomposing in landfill sites where it will emit methane, a dangerous greenhouse gas which contributes heavily to climate change. It's also handy to use in the garden.

- Make an effort to recycle. We live in a throw-away culture, but if packaging, glass and other items can be recycled that reduces the energy needed for manufacturers to get the materials to make new items. It saves things ending up in landfills too.

- Re-use rather than throwing away. Every time you throw something away it gets buried in the ground and energy needs to be used to make another one. Save energy by keeping and re-using packages and bags more than once.

- Give unwanted items to charity. If you don't want something and it can't be recycled, don't simply throw it away. If you give it to a charity shop someone else can use it and that saves on unnecessary new products being made and energy wasted.

- Use refill packs. A great way to reduce on packaging for the products you use is to buy refill packs for items like soap powder - they use less packaging and therefore have lower carbon emissions from manufacturing.

- Buy less packaged food. The more packaging your food has the higher the energy that was required to make it. Try to buy produce and goods with less packaging and send a signal to manufacturers that we don't need that kind of wastage.

- Don't waste food. Energy is used in packaging, transporting and heating food, so if we waste food rather than consuming it that's a lot of needless carbon dioxide emissions. Think before you throw it away.

- Drink tap water instead of bottled water. Tap water is clean, fresh and free so why buy expensive bottled water? Energy is consumed for each bottle created, filled and transported, leading to unnecessary carbon emissions and yet more plastic in landfill sites.

- Take your own bags (canvas or cloth is preferable) to the grocery store. If you take plastic bags, use them until they are worn out.


Useful Links:
www.whatyoucando.co.uk
www.thenag.net
www.foe.co.uk
www.greenpeace.org

I Believe My Heart

With Damian, in our penultimate week at The Palace.

Chocolate Christmas

A little something I did for the holidays.
Singy voices provided by yours truly.
Enjoy.

'Deep Chess' by Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Life itself like championship chess
dark players jousting
on a checkered field
where you have only
so much time
to complete your moves
And your clock running
all the time
and if you take
too much time
for one move
you have that much less
for the rest
of your life
And your opponent
dark or fair
(which may or may not be
life itself)
bugging you with his deep eyes
or obscenely wiggling his crazy eyebrows
or blowing smoke in your face
or crossing and recrossing his legs
or her legs
or otherwise screwing around
and acting like some insolent invulnerable
unbeatable god
who can read your mind & heart
And one hasty move
may ruin you
for you must play
deep chess
(like the one deep game Spassky won from Fischer)
And if your unstudied opening
was not too brilliant
you must play to win not draw
and suddenly come up with
a new Nabokov variation
And then lay Him out at last
with some super end-game
no one has ever even dreamed of

And there's still time-
Your move


-- Lawrence Ferlinghetti